Take It All

Okay, let's say that making a post is way better than doing nothing. Well, it's not like I have nothing to do. I'm just procrastinating. Ehm. He he? :D

Hell yeah, December is going I mean, time is going, nothing waits for anything except maybe those who's LDR-ing? What I'm trying to say is, I'M FREAKING AFRAID IF I CAN'T MAKE IT THROUGH THIS MONTH!

What?

I'm like begging the shits out of me: PLEASE WORK! PLEASE GET YOUR SHITS DONE! PLEASE TAKE RESPONSIBILITIES! PLEASE BE RESPONSIBLE! PLEASE DO YOUR THINGS! PLEASE FINISH EVERYTHING! PERFECTLY! NOW! 

But my reality is like...

I know it very well that I've been wasting so much things in my life but Idk why do I'm stuck here. Is it that I used to wanting to die so much that I'm trying to kill myself in another way? Another meaning? I mean, not physically but mentally, kill my dreams, kill my future. Smth like that? -_- Please. It doesn't make any sense.

The thing is just: I'M LAZY. I'M HELLA LAZY. 

I CAN'T T_T 

Please, I just want to die because I'm no longer able to see myself breaking my own self, my future, and things. Please just let me go already T_T how I wish I never existed from the very first start